February 3, 2025
Tom O’Connor, Co-Author & Publisher
Joudy Ghata, Co-Author & Nervous System Coach
Topic
Healing After Trauma: Insights Gained.
I am truly privileged to have Joudy Ghata as my co-author for this issue. She bravely surmounted devastating family trauma and made an extraordinary recovery. During her remarkable journey, Joudy earned a BSc in Petroleum Engineering from Khalifa University and a Diploma of Education in Hotel Management & Tourism from the European International College.
Joudy proved to recover from her trauma-driven family dynamics through courage, bravery, and valor. She confronted agony, pain, danger, and uncertainty through fantastic fortitude.
Additional Information For You
Joudy’s Family Traumatic Hurdle #1
Joudy lived in a tiny village in the Lebanon mountains for her first ten years without her parents. Her mother had married young, had four children, and was stuck in a bad marriage. She tried to take care of her children but couldn’t. Jody’s mother fled Lebanon and moved to the Emirates.
Before moving, Joudy’s mother made a family arrangement with her sister to leave her children with her in Lebanon. Joudy’s aunt was widowed and also had four of her children. With eight children to abruptly care for, Joudy’s aunt placed her in a boarding school for children who needed financial help or did not have caregivers. As a young child in boarding school, Joudy deeply missed her mother and often cried with a strong desire to be reunited.
Joudy’s Family Traumatic Hurdle #2
At age 10, Joudy was reunited with her mother and introduced to her stepfather in the Emirates. She found her stepfather to be an evil person who threw her mother and her both onto the street. With his sudden action of throwing us out of his home, Joudy witnessed her mother’s mental and emotional anguish. Joudy’s mother attempted to throw herself in front of a car because her stepdad inflicted such painful damage on her. At that point, Joudy’s mother was nearly committed to a mental institution.
With the painful, traumatic experiences that Joudy underwent, she even thought of committing suicide. Joudy had endured over 25 years of intense pain, including physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual abuse.
Even after earning six figures as a student and accomplishing goals I once believed would bring me fulfillment - like becoming a petroleum engineer and day trader - I still felt deeply unsettled, lacking the security, peace, and happiness I longed for. I battled depression, struggled with panic attacks and anxiety, and relied on medication just to make it through.
For about a decade, I searched desperately for ways to break free from survival mode and change my internal reality. I tried countless therapies and healing methods, but nothing truly worked, and I was extremely exhausted. Then, Joudy began recovery through nervous system regulation.
In her own words, the following comprise the specific action steps that Joudy embarked upon:
Nervous System Regulation
Everything changed when I discovered nervous system regulation. I finally broke free from survival mode and experienced deep relaxation and safety for the first time. My panic and anxiety disappeared, and my unhealthy coping mechanisms like excessive drinking, binge eating, numbing with medication, and chain smoking naturally fell away.
Regulating my nervous system was life-changing,
Healed my deep-rooted trauma and experienced a true sense of safety and happiness for the first time.
Strengthened my nervous system’s capacity, allowing me to handle stress and challenges without feeling overwhelmed.
Cultivated a positive mindset and developed healthier habits.
Built supportive and loving relationships that enriched my life.
I broke free from being stuck and confidently pursued my passions and dreams.
I created a healthy lifestyle that supports my well-being.
The freedom and happiness I feel today were unimaginable to the person I used to be. This transformation has ignited my passion for nervous system regulation, and the more I learn about it, the more amazed by its profound impact on every aspect of our lives.
My mission is to help professionals regulate their nervous systems to prevent burnout, build resilience, and create lasting behavioral change so they can achieve their full potential!
The most critical lessons Joudy learned :
Understanding Trauma and the Nervous System: To honestly know ourselves, we must be trauma-informed and understand the nervous system. This system is the foundation of our lives, shaping how we react to situations and experience the world around us. We can genuinely understand and untangle our feelings and behaviors when we grasp their importance.
Rapid Insights: For about 20 years, I felt lost in trying to understand myself. However, once I learned about the nervous system and trauma, everything fell into place in just a few months. It was a revelation to see the reasons behind my reactions and recognize the patterns I had been following.
We Need to Work with the Body, Not Just the Mind: Our bodies hold onto unresolved trauma, often manifesting as physical tension, discomfort, or emotional distress. To truly heal, we must discharge this trapped energy from our bodies rather than just addressing our thoughts and emotions. After understanding trauma and its impact, I embraced practices that focused on body awareness, movement, and breathwork. This holistic approach enabled me to release pent-up energy, shift my behaviors, and create lasting change in my life. By prioritizing the connection between the body and the mind, we open the door to profound healing and personal growth.
Nervous System Regulation: Techniques like deep breathing, mindfulness, and grounding exercises help me transition from chaos to calm. These practices create a sense of balance and safety within ourselves, making handling life’s ups and downs easier.
Feeling Safe: I struggled to understand my emotions and felt overwhelmed by everything. However, as I learned about the nervous system and the importance of feeling safe, I recognized the significant role that safe relationships play in our healing.
Finding Your Right Loving Partner: My husband was a key figure in my transformation. He gave me a sense of safety and was incredibly attuned to my emotional needs. When I felt anxious or dysregulated, he instinctively adjusted his responses, creating an environment where I could feel supported and understood. His presence helped regulate my nervous system, allowing me to process my feelings without judgment. Romantic relationships often serve as a mirror for our past experiences, including unresolved childhood trauma. The dynamics within these relationships can trigger familiar patterns, emotions, and behaviors rooted in our early experiences. For instance, if someone experienced neglect or abandonment as a child, they might unconsciously recreate those feelings in their adult relationships. Seeking a romantic partner can lead to issues like fear of intimacy, difficulty trusting partners, or repeating cycles of conflict. We can explore and address these patterns in a safe and supportive environment when we engage in a romantic relationship. A loving partner can help us recognize our triggers and provide the emotional support to navigate complicated feelings. This process can facilitate co-regulation, where partners tune into each other’s emotional states and support one another in regulating their nervous systems. Working through these childhood traumas within the context of a romantic relationship can help individuals heal and grow.
Resilience Through Discomfort: Embracing discomfort is a vital part of growth. When I sit with uncomfortable feelings instead of avoiding them, I expand my ability to face challenges. This process is essential because it teaches us to handle difficult emotions, strengthening our resilience.
The Body Keeps the Score: Trauma lives in our bodies, not just our minds. Paying attention to physical sensations can reveal unresolved emotions and experiences. This understanding emphasizes the importance of somatic practices, like yoga or bodywork, in healing. Our bodies hold wisdom that can guide us if we take the time to listen.
Common Experience and Connection: Many people who have experienced trauma share similar realizations, reminding us we’re not alone. Recognizing this shared experience fosters a sense of community and connection, allowing us to support one another in our healing journeys. Building strong connections and seeking community support are incredibly beneficial for healing. Relationships provide safety and
Summary of Joudy's Content in Her Own Words:
For me, this missing piece took me 10 years to find. Your nervous system is trying to protect you. Even if you want something good for yourself, if your nervous system perceives it as unsafe based on past experiences, it will hold you back from pursuing your desires.If you want to achieve your goals, no amount of mindset or hard work will be adequate if your nervous system isn’t on board because it stops you in the form of deregulation.
You need to work with your nervous system to show that what you want is safe. It’s essential to grow your nervous system’s capacity to hold these experiences without feeling overwhelmed, as even positive changes can feel overwhelming when you’re not used to them.
Don’t think you are the problem for not achieving your goals; the problem is our lack of understanding of how our bodies work and what’s happening beneath the surface!
Nervous system regulation, somatic work, and trauma healing are interconnected practices that are gaining momentum because they are missing pieces we’ve all been searching for on our journey to live the lives we truly desire. Understanding and nurturing our nervous system can unlock the potential for profound personal transformation and well-being!
Your Call to Action
From my viewpoint, Joudy Ghata took her Lessons Learned into significant action steps that led to enlightenment and happiness.
I continue to learn and reaffirm my action steps from some of the action steps that Joudy has taken. Have you learned something valuable from Joudy’s action steps?
Lessons learned never stop. As long as you encounter new situations and challenges, there will always be opportunities to learn and grow. Thus, learning from experiences is ongoing throughout life.
We live actively in the present. Life constantly presents new scenarios, requiring ongoing adaptation and learning from successes and failures. Reflecting on experiences and identifying what can be improved is crucial to extracting valuable lessons.
The value of Lessons Learned lies in applying the knowledge gained to future situations. This series is about reflecting on the past and using those reflections to inform our actions and decisions.
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